Men
vs. Women in their households:
If
men believe that because their emotions are out of control, and it causes
them to act in an impulsive way this is still not justification for abuse
towards women. Men have not been given the right to abuse women so why do
they continue? Socialization of gender norms and stereotypes
could be one answer (Stets,p.87). If males are taught to be dominant and aggressive while
females are taught to be submissive and passive, such teachings influence
violent behavior and victimization in adulthood. For example, if a male
child is rewarded for being, aggressive, and observes his father behaving
aggressively, and a female child is rewarded for being submissive and sees
her mother passively accepting male violence this is reinforcement of our
current gender norms.
Observational learning effects the existence and perpetuation of the
perpetrator-victim roles (Jacobsen & Gottman,p.134).
When
reflecting on these gender roles one begins to see how some men enter
relationships and are expected to respond aggressively to conflict. When a
violent incident occurs he not only invokes what he has learned but also
justifies his abusive behavior in terms of what he has been taught.
Likewise, when a woman enters a relationship she may feel that she is to
submit to her partners will. Simply put, when violence occurs she may
accept it passively and justify it in terms of deserving it. She may
also begin to accept male aggression and control. Repeated acts of violence are
associated with attempts to control the woman (Stets,p.59). In this sense,
the meaning of control is the woman and not the batterer himself.
Everyday there are large numbers of women that do not report the violence
against them. This is mainly because they fear reprisal from a significant other
(Jacobsen & Gottman). Strangely enough, these women have decided that the
costs of reporting the crime against them was higher than the rewards they
would receive from reporting it. Potential costs for these women would
include not only punishment from their significant other, but also the
potential loss of resources such as a home, car, and status. Meanwhile, the
benefits would be the absence of beatings, which by that point they may even
feel they deserve. Ultimately, battering by offenders is frequently
used to establish control over the victim through fear (Stets, 122).
In concluding, if we can free ourselves from the bonds of what we are
“society expects us to be” as males and females, perhaps a
sound home life can be created that sees ourselves first as individuals in
love and secondarily
as two opposite sexes.
Home | Men vs Women | Homosexual Relations | Women vs Men | A Pet?
This site was last updated
12/05/01
